Friday, February 14, 2025

Why does “XOXO” mean “kisses and hugs”?

If you're sending a Valentine, do you know what you're saying with your X's and O's? These letters likely developed out of a far-from-romantic origin story.
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Why does "XOXO" mean "kisses and hugs"?

If you're sending a Valentine, do you know what you're saying with your X's and O's? These letters likely developed out of a far-from-romantic origin story.

XOXO written on a piece of paper with lipstick

N othing beats giving a big bear hug and a sloppy smooch to your sweetheart, but if you're facing a long-distance romance, it's more challenging to convey your affection. Ending a love letter with "XOXO" means "kisses and hugs," but you might be wondering why we use those letters, instead of "KHKH."

Before the "X" stood for kisses, it was a representation of identity. In medieval times, much of the population couldn't read or write their name. If someone couldn't sign their name, it was common to sign important documents with an "X" or a similarly shaped cross symbol. The majority of English speakers were devout Christians who believed that "X" represented the sign of the cross and Christ. Signing a document with "X" implied a sense of sincerity and fidelity.

How "X" came to develop an explicitly romantic connotation is less clear, though there are many theories. Marcel Danesi — author of The History of the Kiss! — suggests that the transition may have been an act of secular rebellion among those who used it to say, "You can't tell me who I should marry." Researcher Stephen Goranson suggests that it's simpler, and that the "X" likely meant "blessings," which in time evolved to "kiss." It also may have to do with the letter's shape, as some think "X" looks like puckered lips.

There are even fewer concrete ties linking "O" to "hugs," though we can elaborate a little. Dictionary.com suggests a possibility that the first people to use "O" in contrast to "X" may have been illiterate Jewish immigrants to the United States, who signed documents with an "O" to differentiate from the Christian "X." So while "X" evolved to mean "kiss," "O" might have evolved in tandem to mean "hug," given that aforementioned connection. Another theory relates to the shape of the letter, as "O" looks like a pair of encircled arms.

While there's no 100% verified backstory, using "XOXO" as an affectionate message meaning "kisses and hugs" became popular by the 1960s. It's mainly an Americanism, as over in England you're far more likely to see "XX, or double kisses, as a romantic sign-off.

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Love Letter emoji

Love Letter

Meaning: Depicts a sealed envelope with a heart, representing a romantic message or letter.


Evolution: The Love Letter 💌 emoji was part of the original emoji set, providing a bridge between traditional love letters and digital communication.


Usage: [Valentine's Day message:] Sending you a 💌 to brighten your day

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